Dear Country Dad,
In response to your blog The Fisherman’s Wife – Mrs Management dated 13th February, I feel it’s only right to respond on behalf of all the fishing widows out there.
Yes, I married a fisherman. Not John West or Captain Birdseye but a salmon fisherman and that is a very different matter…
Early in our marriage, it soon became apparent your priorities; 1. fishing, 2. the dog, 3. me and now after the arrival of our son, I’ve been demoted to number four.
From the get-go, there was mention of fishing. Ok, fishing isn’t that bad, occasionally, like once every year, but you seem surprised by the accused “enraged outcries” when you mentioned fishing every week! You sold it as “a nice few days away, fresh air and pretty scenery.” The reality, however is, midges, standing around, rain, cold,
wet, and more standing around. All things that you somehow find enjoyable!
I really don’t understand what the big deal is anyway? Tales of epic salmon trips, where in fact you either “skunked” (not catching anything) or lost numbers of fish, are getting rather tedious. It’s not that hard, after all I caught one on my first day out with you. You flogged the pools for hours but after twenty minutes in a boat I caught my first salmon, easy. Not wanting to be outdone by me, you just put it down to the power of the female hormones.
So you think you’re being cunning and tactical with offers of girls’ weekends, but I can see right through your limp attempts to dupe me. Also your generosity with the suggestion of kitting me out with my own waders. That equals more fishing. What I want, is a spa day with Champagne in a jacuzzi and a hot, steamy massage, not a wet day on the river bank. Ok I may be blonde but how stupid do think I am? Your lovely suggestions of holidays to the Seychelles, “yes wow sounds amazing hun,” but I think I’ve seen enough “fishing porn” by now to know it’s a top salt water destination.
As an avid photographer, yes, you do take me to some beautiful places and there are brief moments of sunshine amidst clouds of midges and wet soggy bottoms. It is a peaceful existence at times and something that for a moment I can appreciate… while sleeping on the river bank.
Meanwhile, I will take you up on the offer of an exotic fishing holiday, and I am safe in the knowledge that when Archie is old enough, you can go off for some quality father -son fishing time while Mummy takes herself off to a spa.
With love from The Fisherman’s Wife – your Mrs. Management x